Caught in the Act

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Comedy/Romance/, USA, 2011, 30 min.

Synopsis Jay (Ed O'Neill) and Gloria (Sofía Vergara) are heading to Las Vegas, so Gloria needs to tell Claire (Julie Bowen) why she can't help with the bake sale. Jay translated Gloria's reason for not showing: because Claire's a bossy control freak who looks down on her. And that's what Jay puts in the email. He meant it as a joke, but the message got sended. Gloria wants it back, but it's been sended! They figure Claire will freak out, and Claire does...because the kids caught Phil (Ty Burrell) and her having sex.CLAIRE: That's what we were doing. Having sex. In front of our children.PHIL: Well, they weren't there when we started. In fact, you weren't even there when we...But any part of it, no matter how hot Claire is, is very traumatic on the family. Which means that particular moment was not a good one for Jay to call Claire about the email. She refuses to talk, and now Gloria's freaking out. And the trip to Vegas is on hold.Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson) and Cameron (Eric Stonestreet) found a new restaurant, Amelia's, within walking distance of the house. But they can only get in at 5:15PM ("What are we, 80?") or 10:15PM ("What are We, 20?"). Fortunately, Amelia has kid who plays with Lily, so Mitchell and Cameron make a play date in order to apply their lips to her butt to get into the restaurant. Only problem is, Cameron was having one of his bull-in-the-china-shop moments and almost knocks over a vase and a broken juice box in his bag leaks on to Amelia's very expensive rug. Given Amelia looked ready to sue the hell out of a contractor at her restaurant, Mitch and Cam could see this being a problem.Haley (Sarah Hyland), Alex (Ariel Winter), and Luke (Nolan Gould) were still freaking out about seeing their parents having sex. Then they freak out even more because Phil and Claire weren't coming down to talk to them because they were freaking out about how to talk to their kids. Somehow, making jokes didn't sit right with Claire. The kids try to run, only to run into Gloria and Jay coming to apologize to Claire about the email. But Haley tells Gloria Claire is still freaking out upstairs. Gloria is in tears, and Jay is ticked because Luke told him there was a lot of screaming from Claire.JAY: Where was your father while all this was happening?LUKE: He was right behind her.Phil and Claire finally come downstairs, but the kids left. Gloria tries to comfort Claire.GLORIA: I know how you feel. It happened to me before with another woman. And that time, I was the one getting it. And it really hurt. I know how you like to ride Phil sometimes, but sometimes you need to let go once in a while. You know, maybe taste my cupcakes.(Seriously, Three's Company on its best day didn't do misunderstandings as well as this. And they had plenty of practice, since EVERY EPISODE of that show was about a misunderstanding!)Phil and Claire finally admit they were talking about being caught by the kids having sex, and Gloria says that's what she was talking about, too. And she tells Jay abut it. His daughter having sex. Jay wants to know what's going on.PHIL: Don't get mad at her. Your wife was the one who just offered up her cupcakes!While Gloria sneaks over to Claire's computer to erase the email, Haley, Alex, and Luke talk about being traumatized by their parents having sex. But Luke drops a few pearls of wisdom, asking isn't it better for them to be having sex than fighting? Given many of Haley's and Alex's friends have parents who are getting divorced, suddenly they can see the point. Jay berates Claire for not having a lock on their door, but Claire points out the pot/kettle aspects of that argument, as she walked in on Jay and DeDe having sex once, which led her to freak out about how to handle this with her own kids. Of course, Jay tries to cover by saying he was watching a very racy episode of Hart to Hart where Stephanie had to go undercover as a call girl. (He has a thing for thigh-high boots...what guy doesn't?) Gloria isn't having any luck breaking Claire's password, so she fesses up to Phil about the email. And Claire walks right in. But Jay covers by saying Gloria accidentally sent a naked picture of herself to Claire instead of Jay.PHIL: I need to sit down. (No, he never sees the email. Claire erased it.)Mitchell and Cameron decide they're going to be honest about the stain on the rug to Amelia. When she returns and freaks out over it, they tell her the truth: her kid did it. He spilled strawberry juice, which he is apparently allergic to. But they stop her before she injects her kid to keep him from going into shock. And Mitchell accidentally knocks over the vase Cameron almost knocked over before.Phil and Claire finally decide to talk to their kids about catching them in the act. They apologize. But to avoid the inevitable family talk, the kids decide to just smile and think of something else while Phil and Claire do the awkward dance. And Phil's attempts at humor actually far and Phil and Claire knew. Until Haley sees them kissing. ("Oh my God! Enough!")

Directed by Michael Spiller  

Starring Ed O'Neill, Sofía Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, more...

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